Two Years

I won't be able to sum up all of the things I miss about you. Today is the second year anniversary of you passing on, so i am thinking about you more than usual.

Mainly, I miss your persepctive. Your advice, especially about things going on in my life. With you as my big brother, I always looked forward to telling you about things i had accomplished and goals I had reached. There was a fair amount of competition when we were younger, as naturally there should be between brothers, but as early as my late teens we ended up solidifying a relationship based on real admiration and genuine trust. It became not about competition, but more about increasing respect.

Today I read through some of our emails back and forth. It's really amazing how some of those correspondences are now captured in time— I read them and I feel like I'm hearing your words, sharing inside jokes with you, making plans to get together between hospital trips.

Even as recently as September 28th, 2006 we were sending messages back and forth about getting together. Not once did we have a message go between us without a joke or witty inside reference that, although I would try my best to explain, I still can't make someone else understand. Those referneces were between you and I. We shared them and they are now alive in the form of archived email messages.

Then that last message on the 28th, when you said bring over a flick or we'll just chat... not ten days later you were gone.

This year was not easier than last year, it was just different. Laurie and I got engaged and I couldn't share the news with you. I also can't tell you that you were going to be best man at our wedding.

I can't get advice from you anymore and I miss that incredibly. I hear songs on the radio and I still want to call you up and ask if you've heard it yet. And I think you'd dig the roll that Marvel is on with the movies building up to the Avengers, even though you were more of a DC guy.

I'll never stop thinking about you and using the strength and wisdom I learned from you while you were alive. You're the most inspiring person I've ever met. I miss you now more than ever.

Love to you always,


Bro